In appearance, he is midway between absent-minded professor and dyspeptic funeral home director.

But Chelsea chairman Bruce Buck, immaculate in sober dark suit, has a sharp legal mind.

Behind that crotchety expression lurks a dry sense of humour closer to his adopted England than his native States.

At a recent Wall Street Journal breakfast briefing he told his international audience: “Every time I say the word ‘soccer’ I swallow my tongue, but I do so to make the distinction with American football.”

A senior partner in a US law firm with so many names it reads more like a teamsheet, Bruce also declared Chelsea would never use recorded crowd noise to enhance the Stamford Bridge atmosphere, criticised three months ago by Jose Mourinho.

To be fair to Bruce, no one had suggested the club would, but what was meant as a joking dig at basketball was then spun to sound as if he first came up with the idea, before rejecting it.

He did say that footballers were role models, and that clubs could capitalise on that to irrigate grassroots around the world.

But one throwaway aside gave a rare glimpse behind the chairman’s impassive mask.

“Our manager, for some reason, decided a few months ago to say that the fans were quiet at moments,” he said.

Note that “for some reason”.

It hinted at boardroom exasperation that Jose may have risked biting the hand that feeds him.

“Maybe I went a little bit too far,” Jose later conceded, but the damage was done.

Blues fans now squirm at a barrage of mocking chants from rivals.

Bruce Buck is 68 and, he hinted, dreaming of retirement in Florida.

Applications for the post of Chelsea chairman should be sent to Roman Abramovich.

The Blues, five points clear after thrashing Swansea, play Bradford in the FA Cup, then Liverpool in the League Cup after Tuesday’s first-leg draw at Anfield.

Noise meters may be in use.